#FeministNewYearsResolutions Perfectly Reminds Us What Women Want In 2015

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1st Jan 2015

Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind? Only if they always tell you to smile.

Feeling like this New Year’s celebration called for a feminist twist, writer and feminist Ijeoma Oluo took to Twitter to voice exactly what she hopes to achieve in 2015. And it didn’t have to do with going to the gym more, being kinder or any of the other generic resolutions we so often see. Instead, Oluo created the #FeministNewYearsResolution hashtag and hilariously reminded us what feminists really hope to accomplish this upcoming year.

When a dude says you’re “not like other girls” say, “I know” and then unhinge your jaw and swallow him whole.
#FeministNewYearResolutions

— Ijeoma Oluo (@IjeomaOluo) December 27, 2014

When people ask why you aren’t married, yell “I’M MARRIED TO THE STRUGGLE” & flip over a table.
#FeministNewYearResolutions

— Ijeoma Oluo (@IjeomaOluo) December 27, 2014

Stop telling dudes I have a boyfriend when I’m not interested.
#FeministNewYearResolutions

— Ijeoma Oluo (@IjeomaOluo) December 27, 2014

As feminist hashtags often do, #FeministNewYearsResolution picked up steam and others tweeted how they resolved to be better feminists in 2015. From the earnest to the satirical to the satirically earnest, here are some of our favorite #FeministNewYearResolutions tweets:

Work on my dramatic eye roll / snark in preparation for mansplaining #FeministNewYearResolutions

— stone cold kilzer (@ann_kilzer) December 28, 2014

When told ‘you’d be prettier if you smiled more’, I’ll reply with this face #FeministNewYearResolutions pic.twitter.com/nA1kISZpri

— Heluva Boner Farter (@OreoSpeedwagon_) December 28, 2014

Every time a guy tells me to “separate art from artist” re: Woody Allen/Roman Polanski, I will abandon the date #FeministNewYearResolutions

— Samantha Escobar (@myhairisblue) December 28, 2014

When a dude tells you to “turn that frown upside down,” stand on your head and kick him in the face. #FeministNewYearResolutions

— Alex Millard (@Hippoinatutu) December 27, 2014

Finally making the switch: swapping male tears for almond milk in my morning coffee. #FeministNewYearResolutions

— Shannon Miller (@Phunky_Brewster) December 28, 2014

Train my cats to attack mansplainers.#FeministNewYearResolutions

— Dr. Elizabeth Switaj (@EKSwitaj) December 27, 2014

Drink more male tears I hear it’s good for your zero fucks. #FeministNewYearResolutions

— Justina Ireland (@tehawesomersace) December 28, 2014

Here’s to more #FeministNewYearsResolutions in 2015!

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