Spoiler alert: you’re probably still single.

Looking for a boyfriend in the age of Tinder has taken a lot of the pressure out of first dates. You swipe right, you choose a bar, you grab a drink and within an hour, you pretty much know if it’s going anywhere or not. But having your pick of the area’s most (and least) eligible bachelors at your fingertips can also be a bummer, especially when you realize that most of them are highly undatable.

In a new sketch from Michelle Markowitz, David Ross and Stephen Parkhurst, one woman gets to experience all the joys that Tinder has to offer, including self-indulgent jerks, cheap, crabby idiots and the one guy who you could sort of see yourself with (if he didn’t live in another state).